Back To Normal
by AngusBassPike
Summary: Andy has been in witness protection for 10 years to escape Anton Hill. Now, she's back and is nervous to see how life at in and out of 15 division has changed. Told with some flashbacks, seeing how everyone reacts to her return, including, Sam, Traci, Chris, Dov, Gail, Oliver, and others. Starts out short, flashbacks with bring the story together. PREVIOUSLY CALLED The Walking Dead
1. Chapter 1

10 years. It's been 10 years since I died. Well at least that's what people think. I was put into witness protection because Anton Hill is a piece of shit criminal that will stop at nothing to kill me. He said he wanted to hurt the person who hurt him most...or something like that, I'm not really sure, I wasn't given a lot of details. But anyway, I'm finally coming back. Am I scared? Hell, yeah. I'm not sure what people are gonna say, if they're gonna be mad at me or maybe relieved that I'm alive. The one thing I'm nervous about is seeing him. Sam Swarek. He's probably moved on, who knows? Frank wouldn't tell me anything about my real life, he said it would be easier to pretend that everyone else was dead so that I wouldn't feel the heartbreak of my friends and family going about their lives without me. But, one thing I know for sure is, God it's really freaking good to be back.


	2. Chapter 2

Frank did promise to tell me any news about my father. Made sure he stayed sober; one less thing I have to worry about when I get back. I'm sure Dad will be happy to see me, I was the only real family he had left besides a few cousins and really old aunts and uncles in the States.

So here I am sitting in a typical black SUV with Frank on my way back into Toronto. I gotta say it looks kinda different but maybe it's just me. I know Frank can tell I'm nervous. I'm fidgeting. Sam would probably be telling me that I'm overthinking it. But that would be easy for him to say; he hasn't been dead for 10 years. Well...I guess, technically, niether have I. I've been hiding out in Vancouver, pretending to be a waitress named Andy Mansfield. God, I hate that name. I hate that job. Rude customers, rude boss, rude coworkers. It makes me miss getting shot at everyday.

"Alright, Mcnally, out with it." Frank said to me.

"What?" '_Good move, pretend not to know what he's talking about. Just like old times_.'

"You're nervous, that's understandable; you've been gone 10 years and you don't know what everyone is up to; how they're gonna feel when you come back."

"Why did you ask if you already knew what i was thinking?"

"I was trying to see if maybe you being gone, you would have changed a little, learned to open up a little more. You haven't, and I can't say i'm surprised."

All I could do was stare. He's definitley changed though, a little gray hair, he's still the Staff Sergeant. I wonder if any of my friends have gotten any promotions.

"Is there anything you can tell me about 15? Any new detectives, rookies, marriages, babies, relationships?"

_'I knew this would happen'_ Frank thought

Frank just stayed quiet, maybe I actually will die from the suspense.


	3. Chapter 3

_**10 years ago**_

"I love you Andy"

"I love you too Sam"

I honestly don't think i've ever been happier. I have a great job, a great boyfriend. Nothing will ever change that.

_**Present**_

Oh my god, we're here. Okay, cue freak out. Sweaty hands, check. Hyperventilation, check. Wierd shaking of the body, check. Good, I got it all covered. God, I look like i'm going through withdrawl. This isn't good, this is not good.

"McNally, relax! Everyone is in Parade. Nobody is going to see you yet. I have a stack of paperwork in my office with your name on them."

_Pfft... relax. Sure, i'll get right on it._

I get out of the car and walk with Frank, still shaking of course. I have on my favorite blue Academy hoodie, and a pair of old jeans and my new running sneakers. They're black which is ironic. Some people say black stands for death.

_**In Parade**_

Noelle stood at the front of the room at the podium. "Okay, settle down! Frank went on a little trip so i'm doing parade today. We have a slow day ahead of us so drink lots of coffee, too bad for Sam and Ollie; they're in their 2nd week without caffiene. Whoever loses does the others backed up paperwork." she looks at them and smiles. "Good luck boys."

Sam and Oliver gave her a death stare. And then gave each other a death stare.

_**Frank's office**_

This is wierd. Everything looks the same. Frank has the same desk, with that broken drawer. The Bullpen still looks the same. Maybe it's just me but it seems like life hasn't even changed. I wonder if my friends have changed. The way they look; the way they act. Frank said that I haven't changed. Is that good or bad? Okay, I'm overthinking. Old habits die hard.

"Alright McNally, are you ready?"

"Ready? Am I ready to face the people I left 10 years ago? The people that I was closest to; that were practically my family? I just left them without any notice, Frank. What's going to happen when they decide I don't fit in their lives anymore!?" _Tone down the dramatics down a notch, will ya? _

"It's now or never McNally; there's no way around it. You filled out your paperwork , you'll do your recertification next week and hit the gun range. Now it's time to get your life back."

He's right. I know he is but it doesn't make this situation any easier. There's so many questions and I want the answers but the thing about getting those answers is that I don't want to be disappointed. I had a perfect fairytale in my head that my life would go back to the way it was 10 years ago. But those assumptions will lead to heartbreak. I'm 35 now. Wow, that sounds wierd. And Sam, he's about 39 now, almost 40. I imagined him with some sexy gray hair on the side of his head. And Traci is probably living it up at the head detective desk. And Leo! If my math is correct he should be in High School now. I guess things really have changed.

I walk out of Frank's office; my heart is pounding and my hands are sweaty. How did my life end up like this? What am I supposed to do? Walk in and be like 'Hey guys, I'm back, wanna have a drink at the Penny tonight?'

"-alright assignments are on the board, let's get a move on. Serve, Protect, and say Hi to Frank." Noelle points at him as she ends her speech and me and Frank walk in.

Everyone looks our way and nobody even flinches. They just carry about the room, checking assignments and talking amongst themselves. There are some old faces and some new faces. It's like no one even notices me until Dov realizes Gail is just standing in the middle of the room. She's staring at me and i'm staring back. And at that moment it's like the Earth stopped moving and everyone started noticing.

"Andy?" I turn to my right and see Sam. He looks the same. The only thing I notice is the look in his eyes, like he hasn't slept in 10 years. Like he's been carrying around a weight on his shoulders.

*flashback*

The entire division was waiting the hospital waiting room to hear about Officer Andy McNally. She had been shot in the line of duty today and the odds aren't looking good.

The doctor walked out holding his clipboard. He was about to give these people the worst news of their life.

"I'm looking for Officer Sam Swarek."

*End of flashback*


	4. Chapter 4

Frank walked up to the podium and looks around the room and his eyes landed on me, I gave him a small nod and he started.

"6 months ago we arrested Anton Hill for various crimes, weapons charges, trafficking charges, both humans and drugs, and finally the conspiracy to commit murder of a police officer." Frank looked at me again. "I know all of you must be fairly shocked but everyone has to know that this was the best way to catch the son of a bitch that has been practically a ghost to the divisions of this city-"

The tension in the room was unbearable. I took a quick look at everyone, they were all still staring at Frank in shock; while he was still talking I silently slipped out of the room and when to the girls locker room.

I went over to my old locker and, to my suprise, all my stuff was still in it. I would have to remind myself to ask Frank about that.

I heard the door open, and i looked back to see who it was. Traci, who doesn't know i'm back because she wasn't in parade. _Great._

Traci was putting stuff in her locker and she looked up and saw me standing behind her and screamed. I jumped at her outbust a Traci stood there and stared with an unbelievable look in her eyes. After a moment she walked slowly up to me and held her hands up and touched my arms, shoulders, and my face.

"Andy?" she said with tears in her eyes. "You're not here. You're dead."

"Not anymore, Trace." _Really of everything you could have said. 'Traci I missed you so much.' 'Traci, I was in witness protection and now i'm back'... nope you said 'not anymore'...idiot._

"What the hell is going on?" Traci took a few steps back and began pacing and rubbing her hands over her face.

"Trace, if you'll just sit down and let me expl-" Traci interrupted

"NO! You're dead! You are not supposed to be standing in front of me right now because 10 years ago you got shot in front of my eyes!"

_***Flashback* **_

_"Hey Andy." Traci walked up with a smile on her face._

_There was a small accident on the corner of Younge and Dundas and traffic was backed up so 15 division was directing it another way to avoid chaos._

_"Hey Trace." Andy said with disappointment in her voice. Traffic is not the best job to have but it was all part of the plan._

_"This is fun isn't it." Traci said with sarcasm._

_"Joy." _

_Andy glanced at her watch 12:56. 'It's almost time' she thought to herself._

_Traci wrote down a few notes and turned back to Andy. "Well, the the driver is out and on the way to the hospital to get checked out and tow truck is supposed to be here in a few minutes."_

_"Okay, I'm gonna try and control the crowd." Andy said and walked away, she stood on the sidewalk and told some people they need to move then she waited. She looked at her watch again. 1:00._

_That's when the shots rung out. Pedestrians started running_

_Andy got hit in the vest but the fake blood packets on the inside made everyone else beg to differ._

_"Andy!" Traci yelled as she ran to her. "Dispatch, we need EMS to the coner of Younge and Dundas! Officer Down!"_

_Regardless of it not being a real metal bullet it still really freakin hurt!_

_"Andy! You're going to be okay.." Traci's voice faltered as she saw the blood pool on Andy's vest. She put her hands over the hole in her vest and pushed down._

_"Traci, can you tell Sam-" _

_"No, you're going to tell him yourself because you're going to be fine."_

_"No, Traci...I'm not." Andy cried. And cried. She cried because she would be able to see her Dad, or Traci and Sam. She won't see her friends or be able to be a cop._

_"Yes, you are!_

_EMS showed up, they were in on the plan so there was no confusion. They put Andy in the back of the Ambulance. They told Traci there was no room for anyone and drove off._

_Traci dialed his number and waited..._

_"Swarek." He answered_

_"Sam, It's Traci, Something happened..." _

_***End of flashback***_


	5. Chapter 5

**"NO! You're dead! You are not supposed to be standing in front of me right now because 10 years ago you got shot in front of my eyes!"**

"Traci, it was the only way!"

"You could have told us! We would have helped you!"

"No, that would be risking your safety, the guy was a lunatic, Traci! He tried to kill me!"

"And for 10 years we all thought you actually died! But here you are standing in front of me!" She gestured her arms toward me.

"Traci-"

"I have to go, Andy."

This is unbelievable. I watched her as she walked out and I sat down on the bench, put my head in my hands and cried...and cried...and cried. Finally, I cleaned myself up and walked out of the locker room. When I walked out the bullpen was full and everyone turned and looked at me.

I see Dov, Gail, and Chris standing by the coffee machine so I slowly approached them. I just hope that this goes better than it did with Traci. I stop behind them all and they stared at me and then I heard Gail take a deep breath.

"Hey Andy"

"Hi." I said it so quietly. _Haven't heard a crack from Gail Peck in 10 years. This should be good._

Gail started talking and I focus trying not to freak out, which would be pretty easy right now.

"You were gone 10 years, Andy. Things have changed so don't expect to just fit in here anymore." I flinched at her words as she walked away with her coffee.

Dov and Chris watched her walk away then looked at me. It took all my strength not to throw my arms around them and tell them I missed them more than life itself. _Funny, I just got my life back but it isn't as great as it used to be._

It's like I stopped being me and took my life, personality, and memories, and put them in a box in the back of my brain. Now that i'm taking all those things back out of the box they've become old and musty, and they just don't work anymore and that's a problem.

"Hey guys." I said with a smile. _It's now or never, just like Frank said._

They looked at me, frowned than looked back at each other. I was confused about what was happening until they both yelled at the same time.

"Andy Sandwich!" They both hugged me from either side and picked me up. I laughed and hugged them back as hard as I could. _Maybe, life isn't so bad._

"I missed you guys so much." I cried as I hugged them both. Dov handed me a tissue and I wiped my eyes and listened to him talk.

"Andy, life hasn't been the same without you here. We missed your wierd jokes, big toothy smile, and especially you're awkward moments. We are of course extremely surprised but we couldn't be more thrilled that you're here. In front of us. Alive."

I teared up again at his words and hugged them both again before I asked the burning question on my mind.

"Where's Sam?"

Chris spoke up. "I'm not sure; he ran out of here after parade. I thought he would have come talk to you before leaving."

"So how has he been, I mean any promotions, girlfriends, wife?." _Girlfriend and wife? Please say no._

Of course, I didn't date while I was gone. I really don't think that it would have worked out so yeah, I haven't kissed, or had sex with anyone in 10 years. When you're pretending to be someone else it's not exactly you're top priority. My top priority was actually trying to make it everyday without just giving up and going back home.

"We don't really know Andy, after everything that happened he closed himself off from everyone, actually he just started coming to The Penny again about 6 months ago. Before that he was always late for work, coming in looking tired but he never let it affect the way he did his job so..." He left the sentence there and Dov started talking.

"But everyday after work he goes to visit your grave, he could be there. What happened, Andy...It tore him apart. everyday he came in looking a little more lost. It's like, when you died a part of him died too. But Andy, You need to fix this. It might not ever be the same between you guys again but you can try to. This division broke when you died. Nothing was the same."

Chris took over Dov's Story. "Swarek was dragging himself around everyday for a year after that day, I don't think he actually registered that you died for like 3 months, he didn't talk to anyone the entire time, then when he did start talking again all he did was yell or get angry. He got over that after he blew up at your Dad, and it was pretty quiet after that. Eventually, he just stopped being social again and he was seriously depressed. No one ever thought he would come back from it. And that's how it's been for the past 10 years. When Hill was arrested he became the super cop that he's always been again. He was completley involved in the bust and trial; he testified and everything... in honor of you i guess."

"Wow."

"Yeah." They said simultaneously.

I hugged them both again and walked out of the station, I hopped in a cab and headed to St. James Cemetery.


	6. Chapter 6

As my cab drove through the streets I tried think about what I would say to Sam. Do I tell him I'm sorry? I did what everyone thought was best. If I had stayed around anybody could have gotten hurt and that's something I would never forgive myself for.

We pulled up, I paid the driver and got out. I think I remember where it is. I walked around the cemetery until I saw him. He was knealing down, sitting back on his legs. I'm probably about to have the most important conversation of my life.

"Sam?"

He turned around when he heard my voice and I just looked at him. The look in his eyes killed me. He had a frown and there were tears in his eyes. He stood up and walked toward me but stayed a few feet away.

"So, witness protection..." He started

"Sam, I don't know what to say."

"How have you been, Andy? Are you doing okay?"

That took me by surprise. "I'm good. I'm really happy to be back. I missed everyone. I missed you."

"You missed me?"

"Of course I did Sam."

"10 years, Andy. You were gone 10 freaking years. That's a long time. Maybe I moved on, Maybe I found someone else. You can't just come back and expect everything to be okay!"

"I'm sorry Sam. I didn't want to leave you. You have to believe me, it was the hardest thing i've ever had to do."

There was a long silence so I started talking again. "Have you, Sam?"

"Have I what?"

"Moved on. Have you moved on from me."

"When you died, something inside me died too. You were it, Andy. But then everything happened and my life stopped. Everything paused because you weren't there. I haven't gotten any promotions; I'm almost 40 and i'm still a beat cop because I was trying to hang on to you. This was all you ever wanted to do and if you couldn't do it, I would do it for you. So the answer is no. No, I haven't moved on. I couldn't just move on from you."

"Well, I'm back"

"Yeah, you're back but that doesn't change the fact that you and Frank and I'm assuming HQ all lied to me for 10 years!"

"They said it was my best option."

"I could have protected you, Andy"

_***Flashback***_

_Frank walked into the room and I looked up at him. _

_"Did the doctor tell them yet?"_

_"No, not yet." _

_"Well, what are we waiting for?" _

_My life ended today. Basically. I wasn't actually killed. But it was pretty realistic; that bullet may not have been real but it sure did hurt. It was so weird. The fake blood packets smeared all over my skin and it doesn't come off very well. I hope there's showers where i'm going._

_"Andy, I understand that you're upset-"_

_"You know what Frank, I think we can be on a first name basis now, don't tell me that you understand because you don't. I died today. I was shot in the line of duty, or at least that's what you're telling everyone. You will never now what this feels like so don't stand there and tell me that you understand."_

_"Andy, this is the best option."_

_The doctor walked in and looked between us and sighed._

_"Alright Ms. McNally, I'm going out to talk to your friends and family; is there anyone you want me to tell first? Parents, sibling, friend, significant other?"_

_I thought about this for a little while, it's not like they were in any rush. I'm still going to be "dead" later. I thought about it objectively, my Dad would be crushed, Traci will probably have to be sedated. Sam. I think Sam should know first._

_"My boyfriend. Officer Sam Swarek."_

_"Okay." He said, then walked out. _

_The docotr walked out holding his clipboard. He was about to give these people the worst news of their life._

_"I'm looking for Officer Sam Swarek."_

_***End of flashback***_

"I just can't believe that my girlfriend, who I thought died 10 years ago, is standing with me right now in front of her own grave."

He let out a nonhumorous laugh. "I want to talk this out with you, Sam"

"Not now, Andy. You just got back. Give me 5 minuted to absorb the fact that my dead girlfriend is still alive after all these years."

"Okay."

We both sat down in front of the grave stone. It read _Andrea McNally, gave her life serving and protecting. Beloved by many._ It was pretty plain.

Sam tapped my shoulder and I looked at him but he stayed quiet. "Yeah, Sam?"

"I missed you too. A lot."

We stayed quiet again for a while, then he started.

"I visited your grave almost every single day. At first it was because I did'nt actually believe that you were gone. Then I started visiting it out of anger. I was just so angry at the world for taking you away from me right when we finally got our shit together. Then, I visited because I missed you so much. One thing I do want you to know is that I never drank at your grave. I thought that if you were still alive that you would be disappointed in me for drinking myself into an oblivion."

"Did you really stop going to The Penny?" I turned to him and laid my hand on his.

"Everywhere I went I would see something that reminded me of you. At The Black Penny you were always so relaxed and at ease which radiated to everyone else. When you were gone it just became depressing because I would sit at the bar look in the mirror at your table and it would be empty because your friends refused to sit at the table without you."

I had no idea what to say and I think he sensed that so he kept talking.

"When we caught Hill, I finally felt some closure after 9 1/2 years. So, i went back to The Penny and one thing I noticed when I first walked in was the memorial they had of you in there. They must have put it in after I stopped going. But, God, it was so beautiful."

"Tell me about it, Sam"

"It was a picture of you, that I took. It was right after Nash's birthday party and you were sitting at the bar drinking a glass of red wine. You looked absolutely stunning that night in your blue dress that you loved so much. The picture was framed and around it, was a board where people wrote things that they loved most about you or what they missed most about you."

"I'm honored."

"I never wanted to stop going there. I had to because I couldn't sit at the same bar every night and watch people give me the looks of sorrow and pity."

"You caught Hill, your white whale. That must feel pretty good."

"I would have rather killed him."


	7. Chapter 7

**"I would have rather killed him." **

"Me too."

I stood up and he followed. We stared at each other for a little while. It was nice because for a second it felt like old times; like it was 10 years back and we were the perfect couple. Well, actually we were far from the perfect couple but I like to think that we're perfect for each other.

"Sam, I'm sorry."

He thought about what he was gonna say then said, "Yeah, I know."

Okay, what do I say to that? I guess when I was coming home I never actually thought about what I was going to say. I was just too damn nervous for everyone to learn the truth. I never expected the different reactions that I got, some better than others.

"Need a ride McNally?"

_What?_

"Okay, where are we going?"

"The station."

I stopped dead in my tracks. Great, more people. "Sam, I really don't think thats a good idea right now."

"Andy, get in the truck. You can't run from this. We aren't even done talking about this."

"You still have you're truck?" I smiled as I said it.

"It's starting to run down a little might need to get a new one."

I frowned when he said that, he walked away and got into the truck and I followed. We drove through the streets of Toronto back to 15. We went by where my old apartment building used to sit. Frank told me years ago during one of our visits that there was electrical fire and it couldn't be saved. It's a shame really. That was my home. After everything with Luke that was my start over. Then after it was where me and Sam "started" when we came back from suspension after the Brennan debocle. I had also learned that one of my old neighbors hadn't made it. Not that I was ever close with my neighbors but i'd like to think that had I not been in WitSec that I could have gone to their funeral and paid my respects.

We pulled into the parking lot and I sat there for a few moments as Sam looked at me. "What did Nash say?"

"What?"

"Andy, I still care regardless of whether you believe it or not, what did she say?"

My voiced cracked and tears appeared as I thought about my short encounter with my best friend. "She basically told me that I shouldn't have just left and I should have told you guys so you could help me. I tried to explain but she left."

"She's right. We could have helped."

"Sam, I did what I thought was be-"

"Regardless, she probably should have saw it from your perspective."

Wow. Old Sam would have just yelled saying that Traci was right and end of discussion. "When did you get so wise?"

"Spend a lot of time thinking when you're alone..."

That hurt. "You, know I was alone too Sam. You may not have had me but I didn't have you either. It was pretty hard for me to be away from you too."

"At least you knew I was alive, Andy. I thought I was never gonna see you again. I spent a lot of time alone thinking about what it would be like to hold you again, to kiss you again. I lost the love of my life, Andy! The day you died I did too but you just can't seem to understand how much you meant to me!" His voice got drastically louder and his face was getting red.

"You don't think I get what it's like to lose something!? I spent 10 years! 10 years of my life pretending to be someone else and constantly looking over my shoulder! That bastard literally destroyed my life Sam! I had no choice! You lost the love of your life and so did I. But the difference is I lost everything else too. I lost my friends, my dad, my job, and oh yeah, my life! I had everything taken away from me and I couldn't do anything about it!

"Well I guess that's that. Isn't it?" He got out of the truck.

_***Flashback***_

_Sam was leaning his elbows on his knees with his face in his hands. He didn't see the doctor walk up until he heard him talk._

_"I'm looking for Officer Sam Swarek."_

_He looked up and jumped out of his seat and made his way through the sea of blue, who were also waiting to hear about Andy's condition._

_"I'm Sam Swarek. How is she? Is she okay?"_

_The doctor paused and looked at him. He was trying to decide the best way to tell him without sending him into either a rage or a heart attack._

_"Sir, I'm sorry. We did everything we could but the bullet went straight through her vest and got stuck. We tried to control the bleeding and gave her mutiple transfusions but there was simply too much. I'm sorry w_e couldn't save her."

_Sam stared at him with tears in his eyes._

_Oliver stood in the back trying to decipher what the doctor was saying but by the looks of it, it wasn't anything good. He looked at Sam. His shoulders were shaking and he leaned down and rested his hands on his knees and soon after dropped to the floor and cried. Oliver looked to Jerry and they both ran up to him and tried to pull him off the floor. Sam snapped away from them, grabbed a chair in the waiting room and threw it. Everyone ducked as Oliver and Jerry tried to restrain him. As they did he dropped to the floor again._

_"This isn't happening. This isn't fair!"_

_"Brother, let us take you home." Jerry said with tears pooling in his eyes._

_"No, I'll do it. Jer, take care of Nash."_

_Jerry tried to hold Sam up as he looked at Traci who was walking slowly toward them. "Jerry?"_

_He looked at her with sadness as if answering the unasked question that's on everyones mind. _

_"No. No. NO!" she yelled. Jerry caught her before she slid to the ground next to Sam. All the rookies saw this and came up and they held each other as they cried over the loss of their fallen friend._

_Sam suddenly stood up and wiped the tears; everyone looked toward him. "I'm going home."_

_***End of flashback***_

Andy got out of the truck and walked towards the exit of the parking lot. And she began her journey to...to wherever.


	8. Chapter 8

**Andy got out of the truck and walked towards the exit of the parking lot. And she began her journey to...to wherever.**

She walked through the streets of Toronto for hours until a brown truck pulled up next to her.

"Andy!" he yelled to her.

She turned her head and saw her friend and smiled. She walked up to the passenger side window and looked at Chris for a moment.

"Hey Chris."

"Hey." he paused for a moment. "Where you headed?"

Andy thought about that she hadn't talked to Frank about where she would stay once she got back.

"I don't know."

Chris smiled. "Hop in. I know where we can go."

She got in the truck and Chris made a U-turn. They drove for a few minutes and then pulled into the parking lot of The Black Penny.

"Chris I don't know about this, I just got back-"

"And what a perfect way to welcome you back from the dead." He smiled but Andy fliched at the word "dead"

Chris noticed her change in demeaner, and layed his hand on her shoulder as she stared at the entrance to the bar.

"Andy, you know everyone just has to get used to you being back. Your death rocked the station and it never really leveled out after that. But I know that everyone is glad your back. I know this isn't your fault but you need to start making amends and make them quick."

"I'm trying to figure out how to start. It's like everytime I open my mouth something wrong flies out of it. I'm really trying here, Chris."

"I know."

They sat there for a few more minutes. Andy looked from the door of the bar and then back at Chris several times and then finally decided to go for it.

"What's the worst that could happen, right." Chris said. He smiled and opened his door.

They both made their way towards the enterance. As Andy walked in she had a sudden flashback to 10 years before.

_***Flashback***_

_**Andy walked into the enterance of The Penny.**_

_**"Happy birthday Andy!" yelled everyone in the bar.**_

_**Andy smiled and walked through the crowd of people accepting hugs, hand shakes, and pats on the back. She made her way over to her group of friends and hugged all of them. Among of her friends was Sam, holding out a bouquet of multi colored gerbera daises. She walked over to him and leaned in and gave him a slow passionate kiss until people started whooing.**_

_**"How's 25 years feel McNally?"**_

_**"Same as 24 with a little more experience."**_

_**Same waggled his eyebrows in a suggestive manner at her then winked and kissed her on the cheek.**_

_**"That's not the kind of experience I was talking about, Sam."**_

_**"Uh huh sure whatever you say." He smiled, kissed again on the cheek and went to get them drinks from the bar.**_

_***End of flashback***_

Andy walked all the way through the enterance and when she looked to her left she saw her memorial. _Shit._


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: To the rude person that commented: 1. Way to be a coward and comment as a guest, congrats. 2. Your opinion means nothing if it's not constructive. 3. If you don't like it, don't read it.**

**Andy walked all the way through the enterance and when she looked to her left she saw her memorial. **_**Shit.**_

_It was a little unsettling. I mean a lot unsettling._

Andy glanced at it and walked slowly toward it. She studied it for a few minutes.

It was the picture Sam was talking about. She wore her favorite dress that had a slip down it and it was strapless. It was a great picture of her but she really liked it because Sam was the one that took it. He captured the exact happiness she was feeling at that moment. She remembers that night.

_***Flashback***_

**Sam walked up to Andy at the bar and put his arms around her shoulders. **

**"Hey baby. Having fun?" He slurred his words, but that happens after 3 beers and 4 shots. He's gonna feel it in the morning.**

**"Sam!" she squeaked after he started kissing her neck. "Are you drunk?" She smiled and pulled his face from her neck and looked into his eyes.**

**"No. What? I can't kiss my beautiful girlfriend?"**

**"I never said that." She smiled **

**"Can I take a picture of you?"**

**"Why?"**

**"Because cameras are made for taking pictures of beautiful, breathtaking things."**

**Andy smiled at the compliments, drunk Sam is definitely collecting a good amount of brownie points.**

**"You make a great point, Officer Swarek." **

**He backed up and picked up his camera and pointed it towards her. "Strike a pose, or say cheese..or something."**

**Andy crossed her legs and the slip in the dress fell over her knee and showed off her tan legs and Sam smiled and winked at her. She picked up her glass of wine and sipped it and Sam took the picture. **

_***End of flashback***_

She also saw all the nice things people wrote about her. There were writings from her fellow rookies, the detectives, the T.O's. One T.O in particular caught her eye.

_I'll miss you always. I'll love you forever. I'll forget you never. I love you, McNally. Sam._

She turned back around and went to it with Chris at the bar. She looked at him for a moment. He's aged. _Duh McNally. It's been 10 years._

"I missed you, Chris."

"I missed you, Andy."

They sat quiet for another few minutes just staring at the wall or their drinks.

"Why don't you guys sit at the rookie table anymore?"

"How did you-"

"Sam told me." She interrupted.

"It's not the rookie table with a missing rookie."

Andy gave a sad smile.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you guys I was leaving. I thought I was doing the right thing."

"I know you were Andy. I understand. I am upset that everything turned out like it did but i'm just glad to have one of my best friends back."

"That means a lot Chris." She stood up and gave him a hug. They sat there for a few more hours before they decided they were beat.

"Do you need a place to stay tonight?"

"Um, no I think I need to go see my dad and tell him i'm alive." She thought for a moment. "That's the weirdest sentence that has ever left my mouth."

"Are you sure, Andy?"

"Yea, I'll be okay. If I need anything I'll call."

"Okay, promise?"

She chuckled lightly. "Yes I promise. It's a good thing you happen to come across me walking; I don't know where I would be right now."

_***1 hour earlier***_

**Sam stalked into the station still fuming a little from his "talk" with Andy. He made his way to the locker room and walked in to see Diaz putting stuff into his bag. **

**"Diaz, can you do me a favor?"**

**"Yea, what's up?"**

**"Andy. She is probably gonna need a ride to wherever she's going, she's outside."**

**"In the parking lot?"**

**"I think so, unless she started walking. You should catch up to her."**

**"Alright, sure." He said hesitantly. He hurried out to his car and could see Andy anywere in the parking lot.**

**He started his car and drove out of the parking lot, looking at the side walks to find his friend.**

***Present***

"Yea, good thing." Chris said with a small smile."

"At least let me give you a ride." He pleaded

"Okay."

Chris paid their tab and they walked out of The Penny. He drove towards Tommy's house in complete silence. A good silence however.

Chris stopped by the curb. "Andy let me help you with this."

"No Chris you don't have to do that."

"Andy." He looked at her with intense eyes.

Andy had been dreading this part of her return the most. She was afraid of what might happen when she saw her Dad. Afraid he might freak out and literally have a heart attack.

"Okay." They both got out and walked the stairs to Tommy's apartment.

Chris went in front of Andy and knocked on the door.

**Meanwhile**

Sam gathered his things and walked back out to his truck. He could still smell Andy in the cab. It was the mango perfume that always drove him crazy.

_***Flashback***_

**Sam walked into the breakroom after shift and saw Andy bent over looking for something in the fridge. He grinned and walked up behind her. He leaned down and whispered in her ear while grabbing her hips.**

**"Can I help you find something, Officer?"**

**She jumped a little when her grabbed her she smiled. **

**"Trying to find my yogurt in this mess of a refridgerator."**

**"Oh yea I ate that. Wow you smell good!" He smelt her neck and it smelt amazing.**

**"Sam! You ate my yogurt! I've been waiting for that all shift!"**

**He ignored her comlaints and continued smelling. "Seriously, what is that? Mangos?" **

**"Sam?"**

**"Yeah?**

**"Get your hand off my ass, and take me home."**

**He smiled and grabbed her hand and her bag and they walked out of the station.**

_***End of flashback***_

God does her miss her.


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: To the other guest that had a lot of things to say about Andy, thank you for helping me correct my there, their, and they're but I think you got the wrong impression of how I am writing her. She's not a "needy cunt" she has been in witness protection for 10 years unable to see the people she loves I think that if anyone were in that situation you would be pretty fucked in the head but she is doing her best to keep it together. If you don't have anything nice to say about it don't read it. Rant over. :)**

**Also sorry for the short chapter but i've been really busy with school but I'm on break now so you can expect a very long chapter soon. This isn't exactly how I planned this chapter going but I thought the way it was going was going to add unneccessary plots to the story so I changed it up. I want to hear what you guys want out of the story. So review and comment your ideas. Thanks lovely humans.**

**God does her miss her. **

He started his truck and drove home. He tried not to but he started thinking about Andy.

What was I supposed to do? She was gone for 10 years, and that's a long time. She knew I was alive. Why didn't she try and get in contact with me? What the hell am I doing? I just found out that the love of my life is actually alive and I'm sitting around being pissy about things that don't matter. I'm going to get her.

_***Tommy's house***_

Chris stepped up and knocked on the door. They waited a few moments and he knocked again.

Tommy opened the door and smiled when he saw Chris.

"Hello, Chris. What're you doing here, not that i'm not happy to-" Tommy looked behind Chris and his whole world stopped making sense.

"Andy?" He looked at the woman in front of him with a puzzled look.

This is it. The moment she's been waiting for for 10 years.

"Hi Dad."

"What the hell is going on?" he asked quietly.

Chris spoke up. "Sir, if you'll let us come in I can explain everything."

They talked for a while. Chris explained everything about Anton Hill and the witness protection. He eventually left them to have private time to themselves. Andy and Tommy both hugged and cried with each other. Andy talked about how hard it was to be away from everyone and what her fake life was like. She apologized profusely but Tommy waved off the apologies. He held her while telling her he was so happy that she was back and alive. Tommy talked about how hard it was to stay sober after the funeral but he wanted Andy to be proud of him so he started going to more meeting and even met someone. He was engaged to be married.

"Dad, I'm so happy for you!" She hugged him and kissed his cheek.

"I can't wait for you to meet her, Andy." He smiled and his eyes welled up with tears as he held his daughter. They talked a little bit more and they both went to bed.


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N: Happy Easter peeps. Haha get it. Peeps.**

**I just found out that the love of my life is actually alive and I'm sitting around being pissy about things that don't matter. I'm going to get her. **

Sam pulled his phone out of his pocket and called Diaz.

"Hello?"

"Daiz, did you find Andy?"

"Yeah, I did. I just dropped her off at her Dad's." He paused and then said, "But, if you're thinking about going over there to talk to her I would wait until she comes to the station."

Sam thought hard about that for a moment, he didn't talk so Chris spoke up. "Do me a favor Swarek, meet me at The Penny." And he hung up.

Okay, that was weird. Usually Diaz wouldn't be so forward.

Sam put his phone away and drove to The Penny. He was confused but intrigued so off to the bar he went.

When he got there he went inside and found Diaz sitting at the rookie table. The rookie haven't sat there since Andy died. "Died". Right."

He ordered a beer at the bar then took a seat next to him at the table. Sam felt a little weird sitting at the rookie table. He remembered when he first started coming back to The Penny just 6 months ago.

_***Flashback***_

_Sam parked his truck in the parking lot but didn't get out._

_This is it Sam. 9 years and you're finally facig your fear of returning to normal life. Scratch that. Life will never be normal again. Andy's dead. It's been almost a decade but it still hurts._

_He lay his head on the steering wheel and prepared himself to go back in. It's time._

_He got out and walked towards the entrance. He realized that The Penny wasn't the root of his fear but the fact that he's gonna walk in there and not see her. _

_He walked in and saw all his friends sitting at the bar with drinks in hand, laughing at whatever joke someone told. He smiled._

_Oliver felt the breeze as the door opened and he looked toward the door while still laughing at Jerry's joke. He saw Sam, smiled then looked back at Jerry. He could hear the glass shatter in his head. He took a double take and watched Sam sit in the seat beside him. He gently elbowed Jerry to get his attention._

_Jerry smiled widely. "Hey Sammy! You're here. Want a beer?" Jerry called over the bartender. "Hey put it on my tab." He handed the beer to Sam and they went back to their conversation. Oliver clapped him on the back, smiled and whispered, "Good to have you back, brother."_

_Sam was just glad that nobody made a big deal about it._

_***End of flashback***_

"What's up, Diaz? Why'd you call me down here."

Chris took a drink of his beer and looked at Sam pondering how he should put this.

"Seriously, Diaz. What did you want?"

Chris unloaded everything that has been on his mind. "Swarek, I know I have no place to be giving you advice but you need to get your head on straight. Andy is alive and your sitting around waisting your time, the time that could be spent with Andy. I'm just looking out for my friend. But you need to wait till she comes to the station, ya know, neutral ground."

"Look, Diaz, I know you're just trying to protect Andy, but-"

"No, Swarek i'm serious." He stopped and looked at Sam and then continued with a softer tone. "Look, I'm sure she's given you her spiel about not wanting to tell us. But you have to look at things from her point of view. She was trying to protect all of us. You know you would have done the same thing."

Sam looked at Chris then looked at his beer. "Fine. I'll wait."

Chris clapped him on the shoulder threw some money on the table and left.


	12. Chapter 12

**Chris clapped him on the shoulder threw some money on the table and left.**

Sam watched as Chris left. He finished his beer and did the same. As he was driving home he thought long and hard about what Diaz said.

_I just want to explain how much I missed her. Explain that we're just wasting our time by fighting over this whole thing...Forget it. I'll jut see her on Monday._

It's Monday, today is the day Andy hits the gun range. Getting back ino the swing of things. She just hopes her gun isn't mad at her also.

It's been a few days since she's heard from Sam. Hasn't heard from Traci at all either.

_Seriously though, I really wish my first meeting with my best friend after 10 years went better than that. I really miss her and I just want her and Sam to understand why I did what I did. They would have done the same thing in my position. The higher ups told me, "You don't want to put the ones you love in danger. You can't disclose any information to them about what we're planning." oookkaay, Brass, thanks for that._

_***Flashback***_

_Andy and Sam were coming in from shift and were walking to the locker rooms._

_Frank walked out of his office just in time to see Andy coming in from shift. "McNally!" He called. Andy looked toward Frank and furrowed her brows. She looked back at Sam. Sam was already slipping off his vest._

_"Go see Frank, I'll wait for you by the truck." He kissed her and went to the locker room. Andy went up the steps and through the door Frank was holding open. she took a seat in one of the chairs and watch him walk through the room._

_"Yes, sir?" She asked suspiciously since he was eyeing the bullpen and then closed the shades so nobody could see them._

_"McNally, I need to talk to you about something really serious." Andy furrowed her brows. _

_"Is everything okay, sir?" He was still facing away from her, he rubed a hand on his face and looked at her with tired eyes. "No, actually everything isn't okay."_

_"McNally, this isn't going to be easy to say. In fact, this entire conversation is putting me in a bad mood."_

_"Sir, with all due respect, spit it out." She was getting nervous, as she should be for what he was about to tell her._

_"McNally, we have recieved a numerous amount of threatening notices from some anonymous sender. They're about you."_

_"Threatening notices?" She asks_

_"To not sugar coat it, 15 division has been recieving death threats against you and we can't figure out where they are coming from. Until we do, i'm officially putting you on administrative leave with pay." He leaned forward in his chair and folded his hands in front of him. This wasn't a conversation he thought he would ever have with a officer._

_"What!? Frank this is ridiculous, i'm a police officer I can handle a few dummy death threats." It sounded stupid coming out of her mouth but she meant what she said. She wasn't some girl that needed to be protected. She was a police officer in the City of Toronto, she's the one that does the protecting._

_"McNally, I don't think you understand the seriousness of this situation. You didn't read the letters, trust me I read them-"_

_"Let me read them then!" she interrupts_

_Frank stands up out of his chair and walks over to the window of his office. Andy watched him as he toyed with the shades that hang down. He looked through the window and glanced proudly at the division he is running. He looks at Andy and gives her a sad look. _

_He lets out a huge sigh and walks over to his file cabinent and unlocks it. The cabinet contains all paper work that has to do with every officer formerly, or currently serving and protecting at 15 Division._

_He pulls out her file and flips a few pages before her finds the small plasic covered pices of paper, he takes them out and hands them gently to her._

_**Hello,**_

_**You don't know me but I certainly know you, and I know Officer Andy McNally and Sam Swarek. They works for your division of police. They don't know it yet but she's going to die. If somone doesn't get to her first, I'm going to put a bullet straight through her skull for what they did to me. Swarek betrayed me and i'm going to get revenge. I'm going to take away the thing he loves most in this world and there is nothing anyone can do about it. **_

_**Yours truly,**_

_"-There was nothing else." _

_Andy had tears in her eyes, "I can't believe this."_

_Frank layed a gentle hand on her shoulder. "We're going to figure this out before this gets any worse. Now, you're officially on leave and i'm having a patrol car staked outside your house, for your safety."_

_Andy nodded, staring at the letter. She handed it back to Frank, gathered her stuff and went to the locker rooms to change._

_***End of flashback***_

Andy shakes off the memories of that God awful day. She opens the door to the range and is caught off guard by Traci standing in front of her.

They stood there looking at each other for a moment before Traci walked quickly towards her and Andy was so sure that Traci was going to hit her. She stumbled back a little when Traci wrapped her arms around her and squeezed the heck out of her.

Andy was confused for a moment before she reciprocated the hug. They just stood there for a whil basking in the emotional moment. Because this is the first time Andy has hugged her best friend in 10 years.

They pulled apart after a while. They were both teary eyed when they looked at each other. Traci spoke first. "Okay, lets get you in a booth because i'm sure after 10 years you're not going to be any good at shooting anymore."

Andy laughed and hugged her again. _One step towards normalcy._


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N: Don't hate me! I'm sorry! I told myself when I started this that I wouldn't be one of those authors that abandons their work for an undisclosed amount of time. I've had a busy few months. I got a job at a museum! And i'm getting my license soon! And my best friend told me he loved me! It's all very exciting. I'll update more often, I promise!**

**Okay, so to recap...Andy is back after 10 years of being in witness protection and she was all nervous about the reuniting, as she should be. She had a good reunting with Chris and Dov and a not so good reunting with Traci and Sam. But never fear! Her and Traci are on good terms now but they still have stuff to talk about. Chris has matured with age and sat Sam down and told him to stop being stubborn and to go after what he wants. So Sam is doing just that!**

* * *

_**One step towards normalcy.**_

Sam walked into the station looking like he was on a mission. Oliver watched him walk in with a determined spring in his step and he had a feeling he knew what this was about. Andy had been back for a few days now and things hadn't been looking good for McSwarek, as they were dubbed at 15. Oliver wanted to help but after having an intense phone call with Sam, he decided against it. He didn't want the help and this was a rough time for Sam. Let's be honest, the last 10 years have been rough for Sam. But the sooner Sam realizes that it was also tough on Andy the sooner everything will go back to normal. If normal was even possible.

He caught up with Sam, he was walking fast with his bag on his shoulder, looking around for the doe-eyed officer. "Hey brother, what's going on?" He was intrigued.

Sam didn't pay much attention to Oliver, he was too busy trying to find Andy. He had to get things straight with her. He didn't want her thinking he didn't want her anymore. He wanted nothing but her. "Nothing much buddy, I can't talk right now."

"You looking for McNally?" _God, he's nosy._

"Yea, you seen her?" He finally looked at Oliver.

"No, man but i'll keep a look out." He would. He wanted nothing more than for these two to be back together, back to the way it was.

Sam kept walking and searching for Andy, he remembered the last time he was here looking for Andy.

_***Flashback* **_

_**Sam casually strolled through the station on his lunch break, he promised Andy 2 weeks ago that he would eventually take her to the new chinese restaurant down the street from the station.**_

_**Oliver caught up and walked next to him. "Hey man, you wanna get some food?" they stopped next to Sam's desk.**_

_**"Nah, i'm taking Andy for lunch."**_

_**"Well, it just so happens that McNally is finishing up at a 2 car collision and won't be back till later." Oliver said smiling. "How about you treat your brother to some lunch." **_

_**Sam smirked at him. "Fine. I'll take Andy tomorrow, but you're paying for your own food." **_

_**He put his hand over his heart and feigned hurt. "You crush me, Sammy. You really do."**_

_**"Cry me a river, Shaw." He joked. They stopped laughing when Sammy's phone rang. **_

_**"Oh its Nash." He said.**_

_**He answered it. "Swarek."**_

_**He heard her hesitate a little. "Sam, it's Traci, something happened..."**_

_**That single sentence made his heart drop to the floor and shatter into a million pieces.**_

_***End of flashback***_

Sam was still paused, standing at the bottom of the stairs in the bullpen. Everything was just so messed up. Never did he think that his life would turn out like this.

* * *

It was like she never stopped using it. She messed up on the first few targets, but soon enough she was hitting them just like she used to. It felt so good to hold her gun in her hands again. To feel the rush when it jerked in her hands. Now she couldn't wait to feel the rush of doing the job again.

She was good for the day. Traci had been a big help. Personally and professionally. They talked about her physical, recertification, and Sam. They talked a lot about Sam. Traci basically told her to wait. That he would come to her soon enough and what do you know. She was right.

She was sitting on the floor of the weight room stretching when he walked in. He looked determined, like he had been looking for her. His eyes were still a little baggy. But so were hers. You don't get much sleep when you think that your best friend and boyfri-...ex boyfriend...hates you. Whatever he was, boyfriend or exboyfriend, it didn't really matter. She would rather have him as just a friend than nothing at all. But it would be so nice if they could go back to the way things were before this whole WitSec mess happened. That will never happen though, but you know damn well she's gonna try as hard as she can to get back to normal. As normal as you can get in a situation like this.


	14. Chapter 14

**A/N: So i'm thinking about changing the name of the story. I already have an idea but if you lovely butterflies have something good i'd love to hear it.**

***white girl voice* Re-cap bitches! **

**Andy is back from WitSec after 10 years of everyone thinking she was dead. Some reunions go good and some not so good particularly with Traci and Sam. But Traci and Andy worked it out now that just leaves Sam whom is looking for Andy to make up for lost time. Andy worries she wont be able to get back to normal but she is taking baby steps. Reunting with her 15 family, getting used to her gun, recertification, making up with Traci, and hopefully talking to Sam.**

_**But it would be so nice if they could go back to the way things were before this whole WitSec mess happened. That will never happen though but you know damn well she's gonna try as hard as she can to get back to normal. As normal as you can get in a situation like this.**_

He walked by the weight room and took a double take. There she was on the floor, facing away from him, stretching. _It's now or never. _He opened the door and she turned and looked up at him surprised. She stood up and continued nonchalantly to stretch her leg muscles to control the urge to run up and hug him.

"Hey, Sam." She smiled. _I missed that smile_. Sam thought.

He didn't know what to say. He planned out everything he was gonna say last night, but now that he is actually standing here with her his mind draws a total blank. He smiles. He thinks that will relieve some of the tension.

"How's it going?" _He's smiling that's a good sign._

"Good. Good...um can we talk?" He stumbles out. Once again, he thinks, _It's now or never._

"Yea, absolutley." She tries to hide the excitement in her voice, hoping that the smile shows that this conversation is going to end with her and Sam back together.

He knows that she was trying to hide that excitement. He sensed it. Even after all these years he still knows her better than anyone else. He loved this girl more than anything in the world and she knew that. Now he has to make sure she knows that nothing has changed. Not even a little.

He didn't even go on one date. Some may think that it's pathetic. But anyone who knew him knows that Sam Swarek didn't just fall in love with anyone. It took a certain doe-eyed rookie to tackle him in an alley and arrest him and his heart. And yea, that's cheesy, but you can't really describe their relationship without being cheesy. Oliver always said that they have the type of story that they make movies about. Andy and Sam never really thought so, they were always content with just living out their lives together, but of course 3 weeks after they even had this conversation is when Andy "died".

They sat down at the small table in the weight room and sat for a few moments in an uncomfortable silence. Sam avoided looking at her and Andy's hands were fidgeting with a spot on the old beat up table. Finally, Sam took the plunge and grabbed her hands.

He wrapped his hands around hers tight but gentle. "God, I missed you so much." He kissed her hands. She tried to say something, but he cut her off. "Just- before you say anything, let me say what i'm gonna say or i'll never get through it." She nodded, looked down at their joined hands, smiled then looked back into his eyes. "You have to understand how much of a shock it was that my dead girlfriend walked into parade just a few days ago. I didn't mean to be so harsh with you, Andy but I was stunned. I spent so long grieving over you. Hell, I still was before you walked in. And I had time to think and Diaz knocked some sense into me and I realized that I don't want to waste any more time. It's been ten years, so lets catch up, McNally. We have a lot of time to make up for...If you'll have me." He added at the end.

Andy looked at him with tears in her eyes, she blinked them away, cleared her throat and spoke. "Chris talked to you?" She smiled

He chuckled, "Really, That's what you got out of that, McNally?"

She laughed with him. "I'm sorry, I just didn't expect Chris to be the one to talk sense into you. He used to be afraid of you. He really has grown up."

They both laughed again before she got serious and started to talk again. "There's nothing in the world that I want more than for us to go back to the way we were. Of course i'll have you."

He smiled wide and the dimples appeared on his face, she ran her thumbs over them. "I've missed these dimples so much. I've missed everything so much" She started to tear up again. Sam stood up and pulled her to him. He held her like he was never going to let go. If he had it his way he wouldn't. She pulled back and they looked into each other's eyes for a moment, both knowing what the other wanted.

They kissed so passionately. He glided his hand through her hair and her hand made it's way from his shoulder to his neck pulling his closer than ever. Tongues and lips moved so fast until they pulled apart for air.

"I'm never letting you go again." He said.

"I'm okay with that." she said back.

_Things are finally getting back to normal._

* * *

Sam went on shift that day. And it was the best shift he's had in a while. It would have been pretty boring to anyone else but all he thought about all day was that his life was getting better by the day. Andy was alive and they are making steps to get back to the way they were 10 years ago. They both knew it wasn't going to be easy but they definitely did not care one bit.

When he got back, he went to locker room to get changed and when he came out he saw Andy in Frank's office, shaking his hand. And she had the biggest smile on her face. She walked out and saw him and walked towards him with a spring in her step.

"Hey, what was that about?" He pointed towards Frank's office.

"I passed my physical, Sam!" She smiled widely. "I'm gonna be a cop again!" Tears pricked her eyes as she smiled, Sam reached out for her nd hugged her tightly.

"That's great, Andy!" To say he was proud was an understatement. He was feeling a lot of emotions.

Pride, obviously. He always knew she was a great cop. It was just a shame that so many years went to waste, but he could see that she kept herself in good shape. He noticed that a lot. 10 years. Believe it or not. 10 years he went without the touch of the woman he loved. Any woman for that matter. Oliver had always tried to get him to go on dates, but he always said no. And when Sam started coming to The Penny again, he even resorted to having girls show up without Sam's knowledge. They would flirt, or at least try. A giggle at one of his jokes or a smile his way was harmless. But then they would touch him, seemingly harmless, he would cringe, back away, and call it a night.

BUT, he was taking it slow. They had only rekindled that morning. He didn't want to risk everything just because he was "horny". As Oliver put it. God, he hated that word. Andy he remember the conversation that they had about 5 years ago.

_***Flashback***_

_"Oliver, shut up!" Sam was getting annoyed. Did Oliver really care? No. _

_"Sam, its been 5 years, you need to move on." 5 years since Andy died. Sam hadn't been on one date. Hadn't even looked at a woman._

_"I don't want to talk about this!" And now he was shouting._

_Oliver had dropped by unannounced with a 6 pack and a pizza. They were having an okay time until Oliver got them on the topic of dating. Izzie, his daughter was out on a date that night and was telling Sam about it, not that Sam was interested in knowing that his 'niece' was out with some punk at the movies. Oliver used that oppurtune time to bring up that fact that Sam hadn't been on a date in years. _

_"Oliver, I don't want to date. What part of that do you not understand?" _

_"Every part, man." He paused. "Look, I know it's been a rough couple of years, but you haven't even looked at another woman since McNally passed away."_

_"And there's a reason for that!" He wasn't going to get into the details but everytime he tried to look at another woman he cringed. They were either too tall, too short, too blonde, too girly, too boyish. No matter what he found something wrong with them._

_"Why? Because you always compare them too Andy?" There he said it._

_Sam looked at him with fire in his eyes. "YES!" He shouted. "What do you want from me, Ollie?" _

_Oliver knew he struck a nerve. They sat there quiet for a while before Oliver spoke again. "I'm sorry, man"_

_"It's okay." Sam said quietly, Oliver probably wouldn't have heard him if Sam's house wasn't so quiet. _

_They rambled on about stupid subjects for a few more hours. They everntuall turned on the TV even though they knew it would be a bunch of stupid infomercials and reruns of old sitcoms. A commercial came on for a local sex shop and it spark a question in Oliver. _

_"Dude, just answer me something."_

_"What?" Sam had a feeling he knew what this was gonna be about._

_"Don't you ever get...you know...horny?"_

_"Oliver!"_

_"What!? I'm sorry! It was just a question!"_

_"Don't use that word!"_

_***End of flashback***_

But...I mean, yeah. Yeah, he was. But he figured he just deal with it the way he has been for the last 10 years. At least until him and Andy were back to normal.

**A/N: Fear not! This story is not over! More to come!**


	15. Chapter 15

**At least until him and Andy were back to normal.**

Andy was so happy she was crying. "I'm sorry, I just never thought my life was actually going to get better."

Sam smiled. He was thinking the same thing. The only thing that made his life better after his girlfriend died was his girlfriend returning to announce she wasn't actually dead.

"Andy, can I drive you home?" he asked.

She smiled. "Well, I'm staying at my dad's house."

"Okay, McNally can I drive you to your Dad's house?" He smirked

"That'd be great, Sam."

They pulled up to Tommy's building and Sam parks the truck and looks at her. She was so beautiful and so happy. "So here we are."

"Do you wanna come up for a drink...maybe talk about everything." she paused "Well, juice or water actually. Cuz, you know..." She seemed hesitant. Like at any moment he could completely change his mind and leave her in the dust.

He looks at her and smiles. He loved her, that was everything to it. He loved her with his whole heart and was never going to let her slip out of his hands again. "Yeah, that sounds good."

They went up to the apartment. Tommy was gone at his fiance's house for the night. They sat down and neither of them knew where to begin.

Andy started. "5 years ago, I met this kid named Jake." She paused for a second. "He was 18 years old and he had stage 2b neuroblastoma." she seemed to have no emotion in her voice. And then suddenly she started tearing up.

"How'd you meet?" He asked

"He came into the diner I worked at with his mother, business-y type, always on the go." Now she had emotion. "Anyway, she got called into work while she was having lunch with her son. She just left her sick kid alone at lunch, for what?"

Sam could see a little bit of anger in her eyes, he knows that mothers like these strike a nerve in her.

"I went over to see if he wanted anything else, You could tell he had cancer, no hair, kinda pale. When I asked him he just looked at me with tears in his eyes, and he said 'No, my mom just left. And I don't have enough money to pay for the food'"

Sam rubbed his hand on her back while Andy tried to get the words out. "He pulled out all of the moner his pocket, I remember...it was 5 dollars and 78 cents. He just looked so ashamed that he didn't have enough money. He was stumbling over his words trying to explain that he would come back the next day to bring the rest of the money."

_***Flashback***_

_"Please, i'm really sorry. I promise i'll bring the rest tomorrow." Jake pleaded_

_Andy Mansfield looked at him. She sat down at the booth with him and counted out his money for him, $5.78. The bill was $15.39. _

_He looked at her with sad eyes, knowing she won't let him leave without paying._

_"You know what..." Andy pulls her tips out of her apron. "I've got this, keep your money."_

_He paused and looked at her with wide eyes. "I don't like charity ma'am, I get enough of it as it is."_

_She didn't miss a beat and told him, "It's not charity, it's me trying to make your life a little easier. Which isn't charity...not really." She smiled at him._

_He looked at her for a moment and then smiled back. "Thank you so much."_

_She continued to smile at him which put him at ease. "What's your name?" She asked him._

_"Jake." He paused. "Jake Russel."_

_"Hi, Jake. I'm Andy." She reached for his hand and shook it."_

_"Nice to meet you." He said._

_She looked at him for a beat. "So Jake, if you don't mind me asking...what kind of cancer do you have?"_

_"No one has ever been that brave. Usually people try to pretend there's nothing wrong with me, to avoid being uncomfortable."..."Stage 2b neuroblastoma."_

_Andy nodded her head, "Hang around here for a while, I'll bring you another cranberry juice, on the house." She started to get up._

_"My mom makes me drink that. Can I get something else?" He looked up at her._

_"Sure, what would you like?" She smiled. _

_He looked around the diner, and his eye caught a little refrigerator with bottled drinks in it. He smiled and Andy followed his eyes. "Can I get a Gatorade please?" He said excitedly_

_Andy laughed. "Sure, i'll be right back."_

_***End of flashback***_

"He came in everyday for the next 6 months, except for Tuesdays, that's when he had chemo, and Thursday's, at noon he always went in for an echocardiogram, to make sure the chemo wasn't causing heart damage."

Sam wasn't as surprised at how emotional she was when telling this story.

"Then one time, it was a Wednesday and he didn't come in. I chalked it up to him still feeling sick from chemo. Wednesday's he never ate much. Just thinking about or smelling food would make him sick. Those days we would sit outside the diner so he wouldn't feel as sick."

"He still didn't come in that Friday. Or the week after that." I called his mom, I was so worried. She told me that he went into cardiac arrest after his chemo on that Tuesday. The doctors didn't know what had happened because they were monitoring his heart. They said it was rare but sometimes the ECG didn't always show everything."

"Andy, I'm so sorry you had to go through that."

"Yea, me too. I just wanted so desperately to come back and see you so I could tell you what happened because I knew that you wouldn't say anything, you wouldn't ask questions, you would just hold me and tell me everything was going to be alright" She started sobbing and Sam wrapped his arms around her.

They sat like that for a while. Andy eventually sat up and pulled a blanket around herself. "I'm never going to be able to explain how sorry I am that I left. But I stand by my decision because I wanted to protect everyone."

"I know Andy, and i'm sorry that I was a asshole when you came back but I was in shock. But I don't want to waste anymore time." He grabbed her hands in his and lifted them to his mouth and kissed them.

Andy smiled, "Neither do I." She glanced at the clock, "Wow, it's already 11:30."

Sam smiled at her, he didn't want to leave her but they both had to get up early for shift the next morning. "I would love to stay longer Andy but you need your rest for tomorrow."

She smiled, she understood. "I know, Sam."

He stayed a little bit longer and he helped her into bed. He sat on the edge of the bed. "Andy?" She looked up at him.

"Yeah, Sam?"

"Can I pick you up for shift in the morning?"

"I would love that." She smiled at him and he leaned down and kissed her on the cheek.

He got up and was about to turn off her light and he turned to her. "See you tomorrow, copper." He smiled then turned off the light and went home.

They weren't quite back to normal but they were getting there.


	16. Chapter 16

**They weren't quite back to normal but they were getting there.**

The next morning Sam got up and showered and gelled his hair. He spent a little more time getting ready in the morning, wanting to make himself look good. It's not everyday your dead girlfriend comes back into your life.

He was about to pour a bowl of cereal when his phone rang.

"Swarek."

"Why do you always answer your phone like that? What's wrong with 'hello'?"

"Hello Sarah." Damn he forgot to call her and tell her about McNally. But I mean...How do you break that kind of news to someone? 'Hey by the way my dead girlfriend came back to life, want us to come visit soon?' Probably not a good idea.

"So I was thinking, how would you like to go on a date with my friend Jessica? You met her the last time you were here remember? Tall, blonde, big blue eyes."

_Complete opposite of Andy, nice move Sarah._

"Actually, Sarah I have some big news."

"How big?"

"Monumental."

"Oh Sam, Do you already have a girlfriend? When can I meet her? What's her name? Is she pretty? I mean obviously you think she's pretty-"

"Sarah! No I don't have a girlfriend. The news is actually bigger then that."

"Well, what's going on, Sam?"

"Sarah, I don't really know how to break this to you."

"Sam?" She said quietly. "Are you going undercover again?"

"No Sarah, No i'm not. It's just-" He paused trying to find a way to say it.

"Sam, just say it you're freaking me out."

_Fine. _"Andys still alive."

He heard nothing on the other end. "Square? You still there?"

"Sam, what are you talking about?"

"Andy, she's been in witness protection for the past 10 years. Surprise."

"Oh. My. God."

"Yeah."

"Sam, I gotta go."

"Sarah, wait-"

He heard the click on the other end. _I think she's pissed_. he thought.

Sam ate his cereal then got his stuff together and went to pick up Andy.

He pulled up in front of Tommy's building, just in time to see Andy walking out the the door with her bag in one hand, freshly dry cleaned uniform in the other, and a huge smile on her face. He could look at that smile all day if he could.

She got in and he handed her one of the coffee's he picked up. "Thanks, Sam." He smiled and started driving them to work.

They parked in the division parking lot and they walked in to the station together.

They made it to parade on time and Frank walked into the room with a smile on his face. "Good morning, officers of 15 division. This is a very special day."

The rookies were relieved to see Staff Seargant Best in a good mood. He was rarely in a good mood. The rookies just joined 15 3 months earlier. There was 4 of them. Allison Ross. Jason Stant. Amy White. And Andrew Bose. They are all back from their mini vacation so they aren't sure why Best is in a good mood.

"I would like to make the best announcement that I have ever made in my whole career. Everyone please help in welcoming back Officer Andy McNally."

Everyone cheered and the rookies just clapped because they aren't sure who this officer is and why she is so important.

Best started to speak again after everyone calmed down. "McNally congrats on passing your certification with flying colors, it's great to have you back, however you have been out of practice for a very long time. So I think it's only right for me to place you on desk for the next week and then you can ride with a training officer.

Sam heard this and smiled hoping it would be him. Allison watched him and wondered why he was smiling and how he knew this new officer. They wer standing very close and his hand rested on her lower back.

She couldn't pay attention to the rest of Best's announcements. She could only focus on Sam and Officer McNally.

After parade everyone filed out of the room. Allison walked up to Sam, she saw him talking to McNally.

"Good morning, Sir." She said enthusiastically with a smile.

Sam turned around to see Officer Ross talking to him. "Morning, Ross. I'll be out in the car in a few, can you grab me a coffee and i'll meet you out there?"

She nodded. "Yes, sir." Less enthusiastic than before.

"Sam, aren't you going to introduce me?" Andy nudged his side and smiled.

Sam smiled back at her. "Of course, Ross this is Andy McNally, Andy this is my rookie Allison Ross." Andy held out her hand and Ally shook it.

"It's nice to meet you ma'am." Allison stood tall, wanting to impress the officer.

"Please, call me Andy, Officer Ross."

"Call me Ally, Andy." They both laughed

Ally left them and went to get Sam's coffee. After she walked out to the car to wait for Sam.

Inside, Andy and Sam stood talking for a little until he left for patrol. On her way to the front desk, Andy ran into Oliver who she had yet to reunite with. She stopped and stood in front of him trying to gauge his mood. He was probably mad at her as well as others. At least she thought that until he smiled and pulled her in for a tight hug.

"Welcome back, McNally." He had tears in his eyes and so did Andy.

"It's so good to see you, Oliver. I missed you a lot. You're like a second father to me." She choked.

"I know." He cried

They released each other. "Okay, now you have a good first day and i'll bring you lunch. And I pomise not to eat most of it." They laughed, hugged again and he went on patrol.

Andy made her way to the front desk where she was working with Gail. _This is gonna go great._ She thought sarcastically. She sat down in the cahir next to Gail and looked at her.

"Hey."

"Hey." Gail said back.

Andy realized that the only way to fix this was to just get everything out in the open. "Gail, can we please talk."

Gail looked up from her paperwork. She put her pen down and turned her chair towards Andy. "Fine. Let's talk. Let's talk about the fact that you lied to this whole division for 10 years."

Andy's eyebrows shot to her hairline. "Gail, you don't understand-"

Gail interrupted her. "What's do I not understand, Andy? I don't understand that you faked your death, you let everyone believe that you were dead for 10 whole years. That's a long time Andy. I'm not just gonna be glad you're back and forgive you like everyone else. It's not gonna happen. Now, I'm willing to work in a civil manner with you, but were not friends at the moment."

Andy was speechless so she said, "Okay." and turned to her work.

Out on patrol, Sam and Ally were hungry so they stopped for lunch. She noticed Sam was in a great mood which she had never seen him before. He was whistling the tune to 'Sound of Your Heart' by Shawn Hook.

"Sir?"

Sam stopped whistling and looked from his food. "Yeah, Ross?" He smiled. _Those dimples could kill._ She thought.

"You're in a really good mood today?"

"Yeah?"

"Well, it's just- I've never seen you in a good mood."

Sam looked around and smiled. "Ross, that new officer that we were talking with, she's not really new. But you know that. 10 years ago she worked at 15. She was one of my rookies."

"Oh, so you're really happy she's back? Special Rookie-T.O bond?"

"Uh, yeah. You could have said that. She was my girlfriend."

"Was?"

"Yeah, that's the complicated part of this story."

Allison looked at him confused. He told her in vague detail that she left for a while and people were upset about it. But now she's back and people are very happy. She was still confused but didn't push the matter.

They went back out on patrol, the calls were pretty normal. A purse snatcher here and a traffic stop there. Ally watched as Sam worked the streets, envious of his ability, wanting to soak up every piece of knowledge he has about being a copper.


	17. Chapter 17

**A/N: Please don't hate me. I know it's been a while but I'm back now and I am going to do my best to stay on top of these things. A little update on me since it has been about a year: I am newly single, I am in college, and things are good:) This story is now back up and running and I am really looking forward to where it might go. Bare with me because I may be a little rusty. This will be just a short cahpter to get a feel for it again so please let me know how I am doing and give me some constructive criticism.**

It's the end of shift and it was a hectic one. At least for Andy it was. Everyone came to the desk to tell her how happy it is that she is back and they missed her and it wasn't the same without her. Everything you can basically say to a person who has been "dead" for 10 years. Andy could tell Gail was getting a little more than slightly miffed about everyone "interrupting her non-deserved assignment to the front desk"

Gail was still the stuck up, self-entitled, bitch that she has always been.

_It's good to see some things haven't changed. _Andy thought to herself and smiled.

"What are you so happy about?" Gail asked rudely. "You're stuck on desk too."

Andy was doing what she loved again and her and Gail might not be on the best terms but she was going to let anything ruin that.

"Nothing, Gail." she smiled once more and went to make some copies.

As she was walking to the copy room, Sam and his rookie were bringing in someone. Sam saw Andy and smiled even wider. Yeah, he was in a good mood. His life, the one that has been shit for a decade, magically became amazing again. He got to see the love of his life back in uniform. It felt like a dream. He's pinched himself quite a few times but hasn't woken up and he was okay with it. More than okay. He was happy again. Simple as that. And he was about to make everything right again. He wanted to take Andy out tonight.

Sam walked over to Andy. "McNally!" Andy looked at him and smiled. It was good to hear her name coming out of his mouth again.

Sam looked at his rookie and smiled and she smiled back at him. Ally would never get sick of that smile. Not that she wanted to be a rookie forever but she wants Sam to be her partner forever.

"Ross, you think you can do my paperwork for today? I got something else I have to work on."

Her smile immediately dropped from her face. Paperwork? They always did the paperwork together and then he would disappear for the night. She's been here almost 9 months and he didn't even start coming to the Penny until 6 months ago. And he always looked depressed, no smile on his face, and no tone to his voice. This was her first day back from their 4 day weekend and now he's a different person. It looks like Officer McNally is a big reason for this. Sam said that she was gone for a while so she figured they broke up and she switched divisions or quit the force or something. So why was he so happy that she's back? They might have patched things up? Who knows? All she knows is she is going to be stuck her for another 3 hours doing paperwork. Hopefully, Jason and Amy would stay with her. Ugh, she can already hear Andrews cocky comments about how Swarek will never be interested.


	18. Chapter 18

**A/N: Thank you everyone for the quick feedback! I really do get excited to see a review notification in my inbox! I have decided to write another quick chapter before I go out tonight. It's to get to know the rookies a litte bit. I hope you guys like it. I also might post a second chapter for my other story, Disappointment. Let me know what you guys want. Suggestions for stories, criticism, anything. **

"McNally, do you wanna get a drink with me tonight?" He asked nervously. Why is he nervous you ask? Well, it's not everyday that you ask your formerly dead girlfriend out. he planned for a date but he doesn't want to jump ahead. This was exciting though. It was a start.

Andy smiled huge. "Of course, Sam. I would love to."

"Meet me at the truck."

_***Flashback***_

_"Meet me at the truck." Sam kissed her cheek and took her bag and walked out. _

_Andy smiled at him but she felt sad. Tomorrow she has to wake up and act as if everything is fine. Tomorrow is the day she is going to die. They are going to stuff her vest full of fake bood packets and shoot her at the corner of 1:00 pm. They have everything planned. The fake accident the ambulance and where she is supposed to stand. _

_This is going to suck. _

_She walked out to the truck and got in. Sam smiled and kissed her hand. "Penny?"_

_"No. Lets go to your house." She said quickly. _

_"Is everything alright, McNally?" He furrowed his brow and looked into her eyes. _

_She had to resist from telling him how everything is not alright. It's the exact opposite of alright. Alright was not even in her vocabulary. _

_"I just want to spend the night with you." She rubbed her hand across his jaw and kissed him. He smiled real big of course. _

_"I'm alright with that."_

_Alright. With Sam everything was alright. After tomorrow who knows the next time she'll be alright._

_***End of flashback***_

Andy was beyond alright at this point. She was great.

Ally watched from her desk.

Jason and Amy walked out of the adjacent locker rooms and saw her looking sad. They looked at each other and shook their heads. They slowly approached Ally with their bags in hand.

Amy was a beautiful red head with more freckles than anyone. She was tall and had a great sense of humor. "So no Penny tonight?"

Ally looked at her. "What does it look like?" She frowned.

"Okay, no need to get snippy." Amy smiled. It was contagious so Ally smiled back.

"I'm sorry, Ames. This is just not how I wanted to spend my night." She looked back down at the stack of paperwork.

Jason, Tall, handsome, shaggy hair. Everything a girl would want. Everything Amy wants. It's just actually getting Jason to realize it. He spoke up. "What did Swarek have going on that he couldn't do it himself."

Ally looked up sadly. "A date I guess." She pointed towards the other side of the room where Sam was carrying two bags with a smile on his face, walking out with Jerry and Oliver.

Jason and Amy both looked over simultaneously and looked back at Ally. They felt bad. She had a crush on her T.O and there wasn't much she could do about it.

"Oh, Rossy. Another dead night for you I'm guessing? Swarek still hasn't realized you have a school girl crush?" Andrew said, walking over to the trio.

"Get lost, Bose." Jason said stepping in front of the two girls.

"Make me, Stant." Andrew stepped up a little more. "What's the matter, she can't handle the truth."

Then Amy stepped up. She's probably 2-3 inches taller. "Andrew if you don't step off, I will snap you like a twig."

Andrew grinned. "Now, Ames, that is no way to speak to your coworker. You remember the workshop we did about 'getting along with your fellow officers'" He laughed and walked away towards the locker rooms.

Jason and Amy turned back to Ally and she had her head hanging with her hands covering her eyes.

"Come on Ally, don't let him get to you." Amy said.

"How can I not, Amy? He's right. I'm so stupid to think that I would get feelings from Swarek in return." She threw the pen she was holding. "You guys go to the Penny without me. I think I'm just gonna go home after I'm done with this."

"Are you sure?" Jason asked.

"Yes, Now go!" Ally smiled and started throwing paper clips at them.

"Okay!" they both said and laughed on their way out the door.


End file.
